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Preferred, Deferred

September 30th, 2006

Another beautiful day, the last in our vacation here in North Carolina.   I haven’t spent this much time with Casey since before Kenny was born, and that in itself has made this vacation a dream.

So where has Kenny been, one might ask.   With Gramma and Papa, I’ll answer.   And no, not because Casey and I have been pawning him off, either.   This little guy loves his grandparents.   In fact, he’s always loved them, both Casey’s parents and mine.   But still… Still, I have always, up until this week, been the one that he preferred to be with.   To sit with, to cuddle with, to hug, to hold.   It’s been All About Mommy.   Oh, he would play with them, indulge them in a hug or two, but whenever  I walked back into his view, it was “MaaaMAAA!”  

Not this week.   For the first time a few days ago, Kenny looked right past me and held out his arms for “PAAAPAAAA!”   I was old news.   Routine.   Boring, even.    

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I’m not mad, or sad, or resentful, please don’t misunderstand.   I’m thrilled that Kenny is so loved, and loves so much in return.   But I Am His Mommy!   I knew this day would come.   I knew even that with weaning, comes the inevitable clash that he no longer needs me every few hours for nourishment, thus no longer needs those precious, quiet stretches of time where he snuggles in my arms and only has eyes for me.

It’s hard, though,  to come to terms with the fact that there are other loves in his life.   Other people whose company he enjoys.   Other people who make him laugh, dry his tears and snuggle up with.   Lord help me the first time he brings home a girlfriend.   You know that joke about Dads saying that their daughters can’t date until they’re thirty?   Well, I might just institute a rule that states that Kenny can’t date until old age makes me blind and deaf.

I’m truly kidding, of course.   In fact, as I write, I hear my sweet, sweet son coming up the steps with Gramma, the tune of, “MaaaaMAAA!” on his lips.   I am so blessed to know that he already has a wonderful relationship, a special one, with this whole family.   And Monday, I’ll have him all to myself.

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